AM I ENOUGH?

SABINA MICHEL’S JOURNEY THROUGH DOUBT, SURVIVAL, AND LEARNING TO DEFINE HER OWN WORTH

For Sabina Michel, the question of whether she was “enough” didn’t just show up one day. It’s something that has followed her in different seasons of her life, sometimes louder than others, but always there in the background. On paper, there were moments that said she was more than enough. She was told she was beautiful from a young age, encouraged to model, and eventually signed to True Model Management in 2018 after what felt like a long stretch of being overlooked. That moment, walking into an audition and walking out with a contract the same day, felt like confirmation. Like everything she believed about herself was finally being validated. For a while, that was enough to quiet the doubt.

But life doesn’t let you stay in one moment for too long. Before New York, before the agency, Sabina made a move that changed her perspective in a different way, she left Boston and moved to Washington, D.C. She wasn’t running from anything; she was trying to find herself. In D.C., she saw something she hadn’t really experienced before. She saw Black professionals thriving, moving with purpose, living the kind of life she knew was possible but hadn’t fully seen up close. That environment shifted something in her. It made her feel like she could really become whatever she wanted. It gave her a sense of independence and identity that she needed at the time.

But by 2018, her focus shifted again. This time, it was New York. She was trying to take things to the next level, but everything didn’t line up the way she planned. At the same time she was trying to make that move, she was dealing with job instability, relationship issues, and financial stress that kept building. Then came the car accident and the unexpected expenses that followed. It wasn’t just one thing; was everything hitting at once. And underneath all of that, what she was really battling was losing hope. Feeling like no matter what she did, she couldn’t get ahead. That moment became her lowest point, and it led her to attempt suicide.

That part of her story is not easy to say out loud, but it matters. Because what came after is just as important. After that experience, Sabina went back home to Boston, something she once didn’t want to do because it felt like taking a step backwards. But in reality, it was exactly what she needed. Being back with her family gave her space mentally, emotionally, and financially to reset. It forced her to slow down and really look at her life differently. One of the biggest lessons she took from that time was understanding that doing everything on your own doesn’t make you stronger. Sometimes, not feeling like you’re enough has more to do with not allowing yourself to receive support.

Once she rebuilt, she made her move again, this time to New York, and that’s when things started to come together. She got signed. She started working. She began gaining traction, especially in fit modeling. It felt like things were finally moving in the direction she had been working toward. But then 2020 hit, and like so many others, everything shifted. The industry went digital, and the work she had been doing started to slow down until it eventually stopped. And just like that, the question came back again: Am I enough for this version of the industry?

The difference this time was how she handled it. Instead of letting it break her, she started to recognize a pattern. She began to understand that this feeling comes in cycles. There are going to be highs where everything feels aligned, and there are going to be moments where you question everything. That awareness didn’t remove the doubt, but it helped her move through it without losing herself in it.

Now, when Sabina talks about being “enough,” she looks at it differently. It’s no longer about whether she gets the job or hears back from a casting. It’s about whether she showed up fully. Did she put herself out there? Did she do the work? Did she give her best effort? If the answer is yes, then she’s able to separate rejection from her self-worth. It’s not that she isn’t enough; it just means that particular opportunity wasn’t for her. That shift has grounded her in a way that feels more sustainable, especially in an industry where “no” is part of the process.

That doesn’t mean the doubt is gone. It still shows up in small ways when she’s deciding which photos to submit, when she’s second-guessing an email, when she’s wondering how something will be received. She’ll go back and forth, sometimes overthinking to the point where she almost misses opportunities. But even in that, she’s learned to push herself. To hit send anyway. To move forward even when she’s not completely sure. In a way, that doubt has become something she uses to check herself. Not to stop her, but to ask, “Are you really giving this your best?”

A lot of that growth also comes from understanding where she started. Growing up in a traditional Haitian household, she was supported, encouraged, and reminded that she could do anything. But she was also raised with a very clear definition of success, education, stability, and financial security. Modeling didn’t always fit neatly into that, and even now there’s still a balance between passion and practicality. She understands both sides. She knows what it means to want to do what you love, but also needing to sustain yourself in the process.

Today, her definition of success has evolved. She’s already done things she once saw as “making it”; getting signed, walking in New York Fashion Week, and appearing on a billboard in Times Square. Those moments mattered, but they didn’t complete the journey. Now, success looks like consistency. It looks like being able to work regularly, get paid fairly, and live comfortably doing something she genuinely enjoys. It’s less about one big moment and more about building something that lasts.

That same clarity shows up in her relationships too. Sabina knows her worth now, and she moves like it. She’s not entertaining anything that lacks respect, whether it’s in her personal life or her professional spaces. For her, feeling “enough” in a relationship is simple; it’s being heard, respected, and valued without having to question it. There’s no negotiation around that anymore.

So when you ask her today if she feels like she’s enough, her answer is yes, but not in a perfect, finished way. The doubt still comes. The questions still come. But they don’t control her the way they used to. She’s learned how to move through them, how to push herself, and how to keep going even when she’s unsure.

Because now, the real question isn’t whether the world thinks she’s enough.

It’s whether she can look at herself and say, “I gave it my best.”

And for Sabina Michel, that’s what matters most.

QSM: When you think back to who you were before modeling and before all the pressure, what did “being enough” mean to you at that time?

Sabina: Being enough for me before the modeling and the pressure meant that I was succeeding in life. Was I succeeding in school? Or was I happy? There was always pressure. There was always a question of whether I was enough for whatever situation I was going through, or whatever phase I was going through in life.

QSM: You’ve shared that you’ve struggled with feeling like you weren’t enough. Can you take us into a specific moment where that feeling really hit you hard?

Sabina: I remember particularly when I moved to New York, and the pandemic happened. The world slowed down and ultimately shut down. I was trying to do digital modeling, where the designer would send you items. You would try them on, on-camera. Do a little interview and take your own measurements. I wasn’t getting callbacks from the designers that I was fitting for. You know when they like you and want to work with you. Because they would continue to call you back. But I wasn't getting that. I really started to question whether I was enough for digital modeling. Maybe people liked my presence in person, but not through the camera. I don’t know.

QSM: There was a time when a lot was happening for you at once: financial stress, relationships, and trying to figure things out in a new city. What were you dealing with internally that people around you probably didn’t see?

Sabina: I was internally dealing with self-esteem issues and hopelessness. I kept a brave face when I talked to my family and friends. But really, inside, I was dying. It was hard for me to get up in the mornings and really think that something was going to get better.

QSM: You made some bold moves trying to build a life for yourself in different cities. Looking back, what did those experiences really teach you about yourself?

Sabina: Those experiences really taught me how I was a little reckless, and that I literally could do whatever I set my mind to. I’m a badass. I feel like we all have it in us. It's just about what you are willing to do for what you want.

QSM: You have been very open about your suicide attempt. And I thank you for your transparency. After your suicide attempt, what was the hardest thing you had to be honest with yourself about during your healing process?

Sabina: The hardest thing to be honest with myself about was that it was preventable. If I had reached out and talked about my situation to my family or to close friends, then it could have been avoided. Sometimes I wonder what I was really so afraid of, and why I felt so much shame in sharing that I was struggling.

QSM: For a long time, you felt like you had to handle everything on your own. What shifted for you when it came to accepting help?

Sabina: Honestly, my suicide attempt was a real wake-up call because it forced everything into the open. Once my struggles were no longer private, my family and friends stepped in, and I couldn’t isolate anymore. That moment made me realize I couldn’t do life on my own.

QSM: You’ve also witnessed someone you love go through their own mental health journey. Would you say that it had any impact on you and the way you handled your own struggles?

Sabina: In my younger years, I didn't really pay attention to it, honestly. I separated myself from what was going on. However, in my adult years, because I'm so aware, and I can see the effects more, it has definitely shaped how I handled my own struggle. Now I always think to myself. It could be worse, and honestly, that thinking helps me be more content with the situation. It helps me be more positive to encourage myself to continue moving forward. If I stay in that dark place, I'm not going to think about ways to turn the situation around.

QSM: This industry can make you feel like you always have to show up “put together.” How do you balance being professional while still being real with yourself?

Sabina: The way I was raised, you have to show up put together. I do try to make sure that I present myself well. Our industry and the world. judges you on your appearance first and foremost, before you even open your mouth. I do make sure that I show up in a way that I'm viewed positively. I would say that being professional and showing up the way I want to be viewed, that is me being real with myself, because what I put out is what I'm going to get back in. You know the phrase that you look how you feel, or you feel how you look? It's a combination, and I'm very well aware of that. I can still tell the stories of my past and not be that in that present moment. I’ve learned from my past lessons, mistakes, and situations. They have made me who I am today. I am not ashamed of that because of who I am today.

QSM: You’ve shifted from asking “Am I enough?” to “Did I do enough?” What helped you get to that point mentally?

Sabina: My breakdown, which was essentially at the time, my rock bottom, was it. I thought to myself, what role did I play in that situation? That's where I look back and say that if I had just reached out, then my suicide attempt might have never happened. I think about what I can control and what I can do better within my limits. Some things are out of your control, but are you going to dwell on what you can't do, or are you going to try to do what you can?

QSM: For anyone reading this who’s quietly questioning themself right now, their worth, their path, their decisions, what would you say to them?

Sabina: I would say to them, reflect on your actions. Reflect on what you can do for yourself. Did you make the right decision, and if you didn't, what can you do to fix it? Separate yourself from the pressure to be what everybody else wants you to be. Separate yourself from making other people happy. You can't make anyone else happy if you're not happy with yourself. Stay positive and stay focused on yourself.

QSM: Sabina, this has been a joy. Thank you so much for being so transparent. Please do tell people where they can follow your journey.

Sabina: Thank you so much Queen Size Magazine for having me and giving me this opportunity to share my story. For those who want to continue following my story, follow me on instagram @sabina_michel or on Facebook Sabina Michel, and stay tuned for my updated website, sabinamichel.com.


All photos | Philip Drew @photosbypdrew

MUA & Hair | Naisha Yolande @naishayolande

Creative Director | Tawana Blassingame @tawanablassingame